Beatrice: The Stay at Home Mom

Bad ParentingMy sisters Lindy and Sissy, along with my brother Kevin and I have had to stick together because our mother Mary and our stepmother Beatrice were not always (wait, make that were not ever) the nurturing, supportive, loving type of mothers.

Eight years ago, Sissy lost her beloved husband Don who died of cancer. I was finishing a clinical drug trial in Florida and was scheduled to fly home the morning he died. I arrived in Des Moines and my sister Lindy and I headed out to Sissy’s hometown right away. We knew we would be meeting up with Kevin, and we assumed our stepmother Beatrice would be with him. Nope, she decided to stay home and miss the funeral.

That worked so well for her that she did not attend her own brother’s funeral in Missouri. She had some lame excuse about her health, but trust me, she could have made it if she wanted to. The drive to the town where the funeral was came to less than three hours.

That leads me to the beautiful wedding of her granddaughter Diana. Again, Kevin, Lindy, Sissy and I were present and ready to enjoy our family celebration. Once again (despite Kevin’s invitation), our stepmother was a no-show.

On Labor Day weekend we celebrated another wedding with Raquel, and it was simply understood that Beatrice would not be with us. This time she had a good excuse: she is in a nursing home and has no mobility.

Finally, as you already know, we recently celebrated the life and passing of our dear Sissy who is now in heaven.  Not only did Kevin, Lindy, and I show up but it was an opportunity to re-connect with an extremely dear sister-in-law, Maci’s mother.

Isn’t it tragic that Beatrice missed all these family times–some sad and some joyous?  Whenever you get a chance to be with your family take it.  You will never be sorry you did.


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